Christmas Time...

It's on my mind today.

Yes, me - the woman whose superpower would be Christmas Organisation with capital letters.

And I'll be very honest with you too - I'm actually feeling quite blue.

(Again, me Mrs Cheery McHappy)

It's maybe because there is a lot happening all at once?

I thought I'd use this blogpost as a kind of talk-it-out-Tracey to see what I can change and what I have to accept.  (NB this type of therapy really works for me)

  • Lockdown I don't mind. Being home feels safe.
  • Fewer piano pupils over Zoom than face-to-face - that's alright as we have a contingency fund to see us through.
  • The cost of Christmas - for me there is very little cost as I do my gift shopping throughout the year and use the Coop saving stamps scheme for the extra bits and bobs we might like to get food wise or foodie-gift wise.  We also use these to stock up so we don't go shopping in January/most of February.
  • Sales on eBay to organise, package up and send - again, this is just down to the time of year and it helps to top up the contingency fund
  • New dog and his settling in stuff - he is very timid and scared around anyone else apart from Man Wonderful and myself: understandable, but scary to the little ones when he barks and snarls at them because he is scared. I know this will just take time. Daughter understands and is v.supportive.
  • Not put up my decorations yet..I think this is one thing that is making me feel's my birthday tomorrow and last year when we had the Christmas decorations up it felt really special.  Sad old trout, aren't I?!
  • Struggling to juggle a wee bit.  I can manage maybe two or three things, but when there is just one more thing (even a grumble or a moan from someone about their problem that usually I can listen to and take on board can lead to me retreating and reaching for the duvet).
So while I know it is early days for Muttley, I need to remember that it is still early days for me.
I do manage most things.
But just two years ago I was shaking and asking for Diazepam when I felt overwhelmed.

Somedays I need to slow down and take it step by step.

And I think today might be one of those days.

Take care,

Tracey xx


  1. Hi Tracey, I know just what you mean when you say one thing extra, even a slight problem, can be overwhelming - I find that a lot. A friend of mine suggested I try a system called 'now and next' where you concentrate on the thing you're doing and think only about the next thing you'll move onto. I find it helpful especially if I write a list of things I need to do in order of urgency, and just work through it. I find it stops my mind spiraling out of control over all the 'stuff' I have to do and forces me to focus on what's needed now rather than feeling like everything is urgent and I'm bad if I can't handle it all, immediately.

  2. That may be no use at all, and maybe you just need time to adjust to your new housemate and the changes in your life that's bringing. New dogs are always going to be a bit stressful at first and make things tense, so remember to be kind to yourself and just be you.

  3. Sorry to hear you are feeling a little blue.
    Just popped by to say we used your fab Christmas Cake recipe, it turned out
    brilliantly - Thank you and keep well x

  4. Happy Birthday, even though I am a day late in wishing it to you. Taking it slow and step by step is a present we would all do well to give ourselves. Unfortunately it is easier said than done. X

  5. Hope you are feeling a bit better. I think it's been such a dreadful year that it's no wonder you are feeling down in the dumps. x


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